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The Jewish Manual
A satirical manual to the unwritten rules of being a Jew
Don’t kill spiders. It is a Jewish superstition that if you kill a spider you will not have any money. If you flush a spider down the toilet, you are flushing money down the drain. So don’t kill spiders.
Rule #1: Only a Jew and honorary Jew is allowed to make Jewish jokes. Christians, Muslims, Buddhist, etc. are not allowed to make said jokes. Also only a Jew and honorary Jew is allowed to call another person a Jew. Otherwise it is offensive. Don’t do it.
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